: Welcome back everyone. I am Teejay and this is my Murkrow. For today's page, Gardevoir decided sleeping in was more important then helping read this fanifc which is loosely based on my WoC series. I am impressed however, she usually doesn't make sound decisions. Murkrow will be joining us instead. I am pretty fluent in Dark-type Pokemon language, so I will translate for you. Now we're on to page 3 which is filled with lots of ACTION and a bunch of stuff that makes no sense! Here's the link:
: (On last page, boy Carter and girl Ember plan to sneak into Rocket hideout to find Pikachu. I don't like Pikachus or any electric type. Then they screw up trying to be mates.)
God-of-Death: A few tears enter Embers eyes, but she rubbed them away and walked in the other direction. She already knew her mission, so she headed to the Team Rocket hide out. The first person she ran into was Jessie.
"Hm, I don't think I've seen you around here. No matter I have a mission for you. I need you to guard something in me and James office." Jessie said. Ember mentally sweat dropped at how dumb she was. With a shrugged and a nodded, she headed to the office and went in. On one of the desks was a Pokeball, but in there was also a Persian.
"Hey there handsome guy." Ember said walking over to the Pokemon and petting it on the head and giving it scratchies. "I guess your here to guard the Pokeball as well, wonder whats in there. Ah, but even if I asked, you wouldn't tell me." she said with a sigh and sitting down. The persian after giving her a mistrusting look, laid down to watch her.
"I have a partner Persian. I really like him and I confessed to him, but he rejected me like i thought. But then he changed his mind and kissed me, and I was so happy. But it turns out it was just a Luvdisk. You wouldn't do that to a girl would you Persian." Ember said looking up at the ceiling. "You know, your to good looking of a Pokemon to work for Team Rocket. You should join my team." she added with a grin and closing her eyes.
(Random plot twist coming up in a bit)
: (more like plot hole methinks. Uh oh. Master looks agitated...)
: OMG! She just blew her cover, at like, the second person she met. "You're too good to be on team rocket, wanna join my team?" Implying that she is not on Team Rocket! That's exactly the kind of stuff you have to watch out saying! Especially around Pokemon, they're not just dumb animals that can't understand you!
: (Most are dumb animals that can understand. Except me, am smart.)
Xenomorph: Carter sighed and walked into the building... He might as well gather intel while he was working here... so far this building was like a military station, the troops were mush more well organized than he thought they would be. He sighed as he walked along until he was stopped by James "You! Grunt get over here!"
Carter looked over and nodded before walking over, his face showing no emotion "Yeah?"
James looked at him and smirked "You look tough kid, why don't you take on one of the students and show them how a new age grunt get's the job done."
Carter sighed as he walked up to the podium, the kid looked at him and smirked "This guy doesn't look to tough Commander, I could take him out."
Carter looked at him and growled "Go Toxicroak!" The pokemon looked onto the stage and then croaked it was obioviously a Hardy type which means he was very stable. The other pokemon sent out was a Raticate, he only smirked "Cross Chop...." The Toxicroak then slammed his hands into the raticate taking it down. The man only growled and sent out his other pokemon, Machoke. Carter looked at him and then smirked "Your move princess."
: What the heck is a new age grunt? Is he trying to imply that a new recruit grunt should be more skilled then a veteran grunt? A better way to write this would be if James tried to make an example of Carter, thinking the new guy would lose, but instead Carter won. I'm having a hard time figuring out what it means "he walked to the podium". A podium is the stand with a microphone on it that people use to give speeches, what does that have to with a pokemon battle? Did he mean stage instead?
: (There's a lot of smirking going on too. Smirkrow. They both growl when they call their Pokemon. Is that a rule?)
: Yes, trainers are legally required to growl when they send out their Pokemon.
Xenomorph: The man growled and looked at Machoke "Seismic toss!"
Carter looked at Toxicroak "Counter with Poison Jab!" The machoke went to grab him but just before Toxicroak bounded out of his grip and laid a poisonus strike to his back. The Machoke walked and stumbled but lived the attack.
The man looked at him and then looked at Toxicroak "Hit him with an earthquake!"
Carter sighed "Bounce..." The Toxicroak bounded over the earthquake and then landed on Machoke delivering a nasty blow. Carter looked at the man and then growled "Next time be stronger.... you may then have somewhat of a chance..."
James looked at him in astonishment never had he seen such hateful power...He smirked and called out "Grunt...! What is the next thing we do..."
Carter looked at him and looked down at the man before sighing and taking his Machoke "This pokemon doesn't deserve a weak trainer like you..." James smirked as he pat Carter's back "Young grunt come into my office, I need a word with you.."
: Hateful power? What does that even mean? Was he implying that Carter fought with some uncontrollable rage? Because from the way Carter was acting, I would use the terms "indifferent" or "disinterested". I certainly didn't see anything that implied fury or rage in this battle.
: (It was the growling.)
: Oh right. And Team Rocket members don't take each other's Pokemon, you know, being on the same team and all. If they did that, they would never be able to get their members to have training battles and a good chunk of members would probably leave the organization. I was able to escape from Petrel because his back up was too afraid of having their Pokemon snagged to stop me.
God-of-Death: Ember stood up when the door opened. "What the hell are you doing in here Girl." James yelled when he saw Ember.
"I was sent in by Jessie to Protect that egg." Ember said. The Persion walked over and stood between her and James and hissed at him. He had decided that she was right. He was to good to be a Team Rocket member now, so he was going with her.
Xenomorph: Carter looked at her and gasped slightly "Ember....!" He looked at James who obiviously heard him.
James looked at him and then turned around to glare at Ember, then smirked "Oh so it is the two spies I have heard so much about... Carter and Ember...." He looked at persian and sighed "Ypou would really allign yourself with these fools Persian?" He sighed and shook his head very well "Come out Cacturne Let's show them who is boss!"
Carter looked at them and then stepped back, this was Ember's fight.
: "Spies he's heard so much about" Wait, isn't this their first mission? They certainly act like it. I'm so glad that coming up with different names was a part of their cover. Wouldn't it make more sense for him to say "the world famous champions of the new region I've heard so much about?" And if this is the same Persian that I'm thinking of, then are you telling me he abandoned years of loyalty and friendship with Jesse and James to join some girl he just met because she whined about her emotions for a few minutes?
: (Most disloyal Pokemon ever.)
: I know that Houndour decided to join me right after I snagged him from Petrel, but he hadn't been with Petrel long and Petrel was cruel to him.
: (I joined you because my trainer died.)
God-of-Death: Ember looked at James with a glare. "Actually no, I'm only siding with Ember." Persian said.
"You can talk, wait no we don't have time for that. Houndoom go. Flame Thrower." Ember said sending out the borrowed Pokemon.
Xenomorph: James smirked and laughed "Cacturne Use Drain Punch" The Cacturne took the flamethrower and then launched a fist into the houndoom. He looked at Ember before pressing the emergency button "You are clearly outmatched twerp... So I would suggest you regroup before My Grunts decide they want to beat you up."
Carter sighed and looked at her giving her a nod suggesting they fall back.
: "So I would suggest you regroup before My Grunts decide they want to beat you up." That line MAKES NO SENSE! Regroup? Don't you mean retreat? And why would he suggest for them to retreat? Wouldn't saying "there is no escape" make more sense? And why would the grunts decide to beat them up? Do they have a choice? "All grunts report to my office to deal with some spies. You know... If you want to..."
: (James secret power, smirking. Carter secret power, sighing. Ember secret power, whining.)
: Okay, I get that they probably didn't put as much effort into brainstorming this story as I do in my scripts. And they write each section hours and sometimes days apart, so they probably forget how often they make the characters repeat the same actions, like James smirking before everything he says, or Carter sighing at everything that happens. But don't they at least think a little bit about what should happen next and whether it makes any sense or not? Did this story not enter their mind at all except as they were writing it?
God-of-Death: Ember gave a nod back, and returned Houndoom. Hell Fire would clear a path much easier then Houndoom, more out of shock then anything, when Persian picked her up and put her on his back. He then started to run out of the building. Houndoom, Hell Fire go." Ember said. The two Pokemon ran in front of Persian and used Flame Thrower to clear people out of the way. Those that dodged then got in the way again where ran down by the two dog Pokemon. Spirit showed up as well, having learned Teleport from a TM resently. She returned the two dog Pokemon, put Persian into a spare Pokeball she had, grabbed her Pokemon around the neck, and was teleported away.
"Is Carter back yet. We where discovered. I don't know how it was started but I grabbed the Pokeball while battling James. Its empty." Ember said panting a bit. She returned the Houndoom to them, then went to her room and let Persian out. "I think you need a name Persian. Something regal sounding. Hm, or I know. Your going to be Prince." Ember said grinning at him.
"Prince huh, I like the name, but Ember. I'm sorry, I think James might have gotten to your friend." Prince said. Ember nodded and went to his room. She took one of his Pokemon's Pokeball and left the empty one she stole from Jessie and James in its place. She then returned Bravador. With that, she returned to her own room.
"I'll give it back if it turns out he's fine. If he changes though, and becomes one of them, I'll need something to remind him of the old days." Ember said to Prince and her team holding the ball in her hand.
"I'll help you storm the Racket base. I know of secret ways in." Prince said determined to help his new trainer.
: Not really sure how she put Persian into a spare Pokeball she had. If this is based on WoC, then he already had a pokeball or was a dark poke, either way, she couldn't put him a new pokeball.
: (Where did girl teleported to? Am confused...)
: I agree, the authors need to establish settings in their writings. At least say something like "Back at Police Headquarters"
: (Haha. She named Persian "Prince". Sissy name. My old master called me "Darkwing". Cool name, but Teejay just call me Murkrow.)
: Nicknaming my Pokemon is just something I never really did. Easier to call them by their species, especially in the heat of battle. Prince Persian... Prince of Persia. I don't suppose they got name from anywhere... Alright, next thing is Ember worrying about Carter deciding to join Team Rocket. Why would she think that? I didn't see anything in Carter's attitude that made me think he was interested in Team Rocket at all or this mission for that matter.
Xenomorph: Carter walked back to the base and sighed as he walked through the Jenny's and grabbed his pokeballs before noticing one was gone... His Bravador. He walked over to Ember and sighed "Ember... I need my Pokemon, have you seen Bravador?" He rubbed his head and looked at the Persian with a scowl before looking at Ember "Look I am going back to scout out Team Rocket's base." He then pulled her closer and looked into her eyes with a smirk "You could join me you know~" He smiled and moved his head and brushed his nose up her neck.
God-of-Death: "Ah, I would like to, but they caught me already. I wont be able to go back now. And no I uh, don't think I've seen it since before we left. If I do see him, I'll send him your way. And why would you need all of your Pokemon." Ember asked raising an eyebrow. "And what do you have against Prince."
: *sighs* THEY CAUGHT HIM TOO! *smirks*
Xenomorph: Carter looked over at Prince and then shrugged "Meh, normal types really never struck a cord with me... but seriously? I want my Bravador back... should there be some special reason why?" He took her chin in his fingers and looked her in the eyes "Please~?" He kissed on her cheek and smirked
God-of-Death: With a blush and a sigh, she went to her bag and pulled out a Pokeball that she at the moment thought held Bravador. In reality, it was empty. "Here you, I snag it when I heard rumours that you changed and wanted to join Team Rocket." Ember said. "I just wanted something to remind myself of you." she said with a tear in one eye.
: (Did we skip some parts? Like the part where she heard rumors of his betrayal?)
: *smirks* Not that I know of... *sighs*
Xenomorph: Rkght when she said that his whole demeanor changed from playful to suspiciously deppressed "Oh... I-I see, well" He took her hands "You could still come with me, Ember we could finnaly gave the life you always dreamed of, a world were it would be you and me and we could live without fear of the dark pokemon." He looked into her eyes and smiled "We could finally be free to do what we want and not have to wait on the whims of others." His eyes were full of excitement as he smiled at her and awaited an answer.
: How exactly would joining Team Rocket gave them the life they always dreamed of where they could be together and live free of the Dark Pokemon? Not to mention being free from the whims of others. Why don't they just do what they want now? The author's never established why they were being called to spy on Team Rocket to begin with. Did they get arrested for something and sentenced to some kind community service? I understand what the authors are trying to do, but they do a very poor job of setting it up and tying it together.
God-of-Death: "I would like that world, but not if it meant working for Team Rocket. That Pokeball is empty, so here is Bravador's Pokeball. I'll see you again someday, I just know it Carter, but It'll be a while. Godd bye Carter, I have to leave now. There sending me to Cinnabar island for one last mission attempt." Ember said kissing him on the lips and walking out of the room. She had two Pokeballs on her waist and the other five in her bag. With dark Pokemon around, they let you keep as many Pokemon with you as you owned. Ember walked out of the building and simply left. It wasn't until later the night did the Jenny's notice she was gone, and by then. Ember was on a boat to Cinnibar island. A fog rolled in and the boat vanished from radar. A month later, Ember and the Team was declared dead.
: Actually, they only allowed us to have six Pokemon on the Frontlines and the special missions like Cinnibar Island. Since it wasn't always possible to recover the pokeballs from dead trainers, they wanted to minimize the potential of lost Pokemon. For example, if a trainer carried 12 pokemon with him and got killed, that would be six extra Pokemon that would be lost.
: (Ember's dead, story over. Good.)
: Fraid' not. There's still six pages left to go.
: (I'll go wake up Gardevoir now.)
Xenomorph: Carter looked at her and gently brushed his lips and looked at the Pokeball... He sighed and looked up at her and watched her leave. He sighed and looked at Bravador again "Very well... But when we meet, it will no longer be as friends but as enemies." Carter threw the empty pokeball on the ground and smashed it before jumping out of the window. About a half a year later and Carter was seated among some of the best admins only taking orders from lord giovanni himself. He let out a sigh as Bravador stood there and looked at him, he himself was obviously stunned in Carter's choice but as a long time friend he did owe his loyalty to Carter.
: HAHAHA! He jumped out the window? Um, you do know there was a door, right Carter? Haha. I didn't know this was a comedy!
Carter pressed on the intercom "Send them in..." Carter had received a distress call from three grunt who were working on a part of the sinnoh region who were trying to see on how they could get Ditto's to permanently transform into the pokemon they became thus becoming the pokemon themselves and opening new and exciting capabilities meaning stronger pokemon, it was actually one of Carter's ideas. Carter sighed "Ok so tell me what happened."
: Trying to get Ditto's to permanently transform? That does sound like a cockamamie idea Team Rocket would come up with. And how did Carter get to be an executive after being exposed as a spy? From what I remember, when a spy was discovered, they were usually never seen again.
"The base sir, it was just overrun! It just started acting funny and the next thing you know kaput! We think one of the dark pokemon shield generators may have malfunctioned." The first grunt said rubbing his head.
Carter took him by the hat and slammed him on the desk "You miserable fool! there was no way that those generators could have gone out, that must mean someone tampered with them. Was there any signs of tampering?"
"N-no sir! We swear the generators were just fine!" The grunt said afraid of Carter's intimidating stature. Carter growled and picked him up "Then it was obviously sabotage from inside the base, you need to get your sorry asses down there and go find out what went wrong. If you dissapoint me again I will have Toxicroak tear you a new one. Am I understood" They all nodded in a very timid manner and scurried out the door. He let out a sigh and returned to his chair sitting down and looking up at the ceiling.
: (Isn't tampering and sabotage the same thing?)
: Not always. Sabotage may be performed by tampering, but tampering itself may not imply malicious intent. In this case, if there were no signs of tampering, there would be no signs of sabotage either.
God-of-Death: Ember's boat had crashed into an island, and she was thrown from it. Ember got lucky as she landed on the island but the boat sank. She found two Pokemon egg's on the island which she caught when it hatched. She spent half a year raising her team and recovering. After one a few hours on the island she found that there were wild Pokemon there that hadn't been effected by the fog. Most where water types, with a few normal and ice types mixed in. She left them free, but did battle them to trainer her team. After half a year, she decided the two newest members of her team, both fire types, were ready to go, and she had Spirit teleport her out. She ended up in an abandoned Plasma base. After looking about she found a paper and learned that Carter had become an Executive of team Rocket.
"I go missing for half a year, and he joins Team Rocket. Fine then, I'll just take out Team rocket then." Ember had said at the time. And so she did, tearing threw Rocket bases with ease. No one ever suspected it was her and the only evidence she left behind wouldn't make sense to anyone but Carter. She only ever left behind a scorch mark in the shape his team. You would have to put several pictures of the marks together to make just one Pokemon though.
"Figure it out and come for me, Carter." Ember said one day, leaving a base after blowing up the generators that kept the dark Pokemon out. Ember had learned on that island how to deal with the dark Pokemon, and now she didn't fear them.
: Looks like they're ending this page with the craziest stuff yet! It won't be easy to go through this, so... Finish strong for us Murkrow!
: (... I hate you. Well, here goes:
1 - Her ship runs aground and throws her out and then sinks in shallow water.
2 - It's Chaos Clouds, not fog.
3 - All Pokemon without pokeballs are effected.
4 - She acts surprised that boy join Team Rocket even though she already knew he would do that when she rejected chance to join with him.
5 - Not being afraid of Dark Pokemon = early grave.
6 - Am outta here. )
: Okay okay, we're done with page 3 anyway. Thanks for reading with us everyone. See you on page 4.